Monday, February 1, 2010

More on child-rearing…

I have a tendency to scribble my thoughts on the back pages of books. It’s a filthy habit, I know. So Saturday, I get a call from my son, J. He’s working with his Dad at a shoot in Belgium. I can tell he’s nervous. Embarrassed.
“Mom?” he says. Then “Mom?” again.
“I’m here, J. What’s up?”
“That book you sent me? The Art of Deception?”
“Fabulous, right? Best thriller she ever wrote!”
“Yeah. But that’s not why I’m calling. There’s stuff written in the back…”
“I always do that,” I say. “Which doesn’t mean you should.”
“Well, it’s really weird, Mom. I wish I hadn’t seen it.”
“Oh Jesus!” I’m thinking. This is NOT good.
“Weird, how?” I ask, calmly.
He’s stammering. “Weird like “I’m a free bitch. And do you want to fuck me.”
I’m laughing so hysterically, I can’t breathe.
“It’s not funny, Mom.”
“Yes, it is, J. Relax.”
“Why should I?”
“Because it’s Lady Gaga not me. It’s stuff she said at the concert. I was gonna blog it.”
“Oh my God!” he yelps with relief before fits of laughter. “I was terrified Dad would see it.”
“I miss you, J. Say hi to Dad!”
He hangs up, still guffawing.

There are some kids who would never have “shared” this discovery; who would have probably kept their mouths shut, harboring the secret for years, while assuming their mother had lost it. Or worse. But I’ll certainly bear this moment in mind the next time I’m free associating/scribbling down my thoughts in the dead of night.

Posted by Brenda in 18:46:56

6 Responses to “More on child-rearing…”

  1. Uncle Vinny says:

    Hahahahahhahaaaaaaa! I love this story, B.

  2. leigh says:

    He knows you, which is why he brought it up, right? On the parenting theme–My first born is experiencing her first heartache, growing out of her relationship. We talked for a long time last night. Rite de passage for both of us.

  3. scribbler50 says:

    Not exactly a chapter out of “I Remember Mama” (remember that?) but a kid would be lucky to have you as a mom. Never a dull moment and always, always, openness and honesty. Great story, Brenda!

  4. marcuchik says:

    the child teaches the parent…..and i;d venture that someday when he’s a dad he’ll see both sides of this as well, and yes, he’ll understand how important it is for your child to feel confident and comfortable enough to ask you such a thing!

  5. blue girl says:

    First of all, how cool is being on a shoot in Belgium?

    Also. LOLOLOL :)

  6. giovanna says:

    I guess was really about Lady Gaga…because I find myself in a similar situation
    and I didn’t find a solution yet
    Can you really tell all about you to your son? And what happens when the stuff you don’t want to tell are about you, his father and the boy himself? Worst of all, what if you already told the story, maybe in a book in an anonimous way, but never got the audacity to tell him?
    I know, it sounds weird but I feel in between, I always wanted to tell him the truth (and now he is a grownup, he is thirty), but I don’t if it is the right thing to do
    well, I realize my comment it is a little bit cryptic, so I just ask the question: do you tell everything to your children when they grow up?

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